From Heroin to Healer: Breaking Generational Trauma & Finding Purpose
We live in a world that praises the "High-Functioning" man. You know the type: he hits his sales quotas, drives the right car, and smiles in the family photos. But behind closed doors, he is suffocating.
He is running on a treadmill of anxiety, medicating his stress with substances, and terrified that if he stops, his entire world will crumble.
On this week’s episode of The Modern Man Podcast, I sat down with a man who lived that lie to the extreme. Jesse Todisco was a successful salesman by day and a heroin addict by night. His journey from the depths of addiction to becoming a spiritual healer is one of the most powerful conversations I’ve ever had on this show.
If you feel like you are just "drifting" through life, or if you are scared you are becoming exactly like the father you swore you’d never be… you need to read this.
The Myth of the "High-Functioning" Addict
We often picture rock bottom as a man under a bridge. But for many modern men, rock bottom looks like a corner office.
Jesse grew up in Boston, the son of a heroin addict. He swore he would never be like his father. He was athletic, ambitious, and successful. He worked hard. But he had a void inside him that success couldn’t fill.
It started with "trying to be a tough guy" and selling drugs, but it spiraled into using them. For months, he lived a double life. He describes the psychological torture of high-functioning addiction perfectly:
"I would be high and have a dream of being sober, but then wake up to my reality of being a junkie." — Jesse Todisco
The Lesson: You cannot out-earn, out-lift, or out-hustle a lack of purpose. If you don't deal with your demons, they will eventually make the decisions for you.
The 30-Hour Bus Ride That Saved His Life
Change doesn't happen until the pain of staying the same outweighs the pain of change. For Jesse, that moment came in 2006.
He quit heroin cold turkey. No rehab. No taper. He bought a Greyhound bus ticket from Boston to Georgia—a 30-hour ride through hell. He spent days sweating, shaking, and suffering through withdrawals.
Why? Because he realized a fundamental truth about hitting the bottom:
"Eventually rock bottom, you either find a basement to grow from, or you end up staying there until you die."
He chose the basement. He chose to build a foundation. He found a new career in sales, built structure, found discipline, and for the first time since the military, found a purpose.
The "Impossible" Experience: Ayahuasca & The Afterlife
This is where the story shifts from "Recovery" to "Transformation."
Jesse didn't just want to be sober; he wanted to be awake. He began exploring spirituality, breathwork, and eventually, plant medicine. He traveled to Peru to sit with shamans and drink Ayahuasca.
What happened next defies logic.
Jesse had a daughter who passed away at just seven days old. For 13 years, she was gone. But during his ceremony in Peru, something miraculous happened.
"I was with my daughter for two hours. She was dead for 13 years... I saw my ancestors in the clouds... and I sat there with the most love in my heart because I know now that they don't leave."
Whether you believe in plant medicine or not, the takeaway is undeniable: We are spiritual beings having a human experience. When we tap into that, we lose our fear of death, and more importantly, our fear of living.
Breaking The Cycle: "I Craved the Dad I Am"
The Modern Man isn't just a provider; he is a cycle-breaker.
Jesse’s biggest fear was becoming his father. But through his healing journey, he realized that "fighting" his past wasn't the answer… Embodying the new standard was.
He said something during our interview that every father needs to hear:
"I always craved the dad that I am... I needed me for a dad."
He admits he isn't perfect. He still loses his temper. But the difference between a reactive man and a Modern Man is the repair. When Jesse messes up, he stops, looks his children in the eye, and apologizes. He tells them, "Daddy is screwing up. I'm sorry.".
That is how you break generational trauma. Not by being perfect, but by being accountable.
Tactical Tool: How to Hack Depression (Gratitude Stacking)
We talk a lot about "Time Mastery" in the Modern Man ecosystem, but you also need to master your energy.
Jesse shared a tactical tool for those moments when you feel the darkness creeping in. He calls it Gratitude Stacking.
If you are feeling depressed, anxious, or overwhelmed, do this immediately:
State the Basics: "I woke up. I am alive. I am in a warm bed.".
Force the Physiology: Put a smile on your face (even if it’s fake).
Move the Energy: Move your body. Jesse literally lays in bed and shakes his hips or dances to music.
It sounds simple, but emotion is just energy in motion. If you don't move the body, the mind stays stuck.
The Verdict
Jesse Todisco’s story proves that no matter how far you have fallen, you are never out of the fight. But you cannot do it alone. As Jesse said, "We are here to walk each other home".
Are you walking alone?
If you are ready to stop drifting and start leading, it’s time to join a tribe that sharpens you.
[Listen to the Full Episode Here]
Master Your Time. Lead Your Life.
Ready to take the next step? Join the Noble Knights, our brotherhood of men dedicated to mastering their time, health, and relationships. [Join The Community Here]⚔️
